Bikini Bodies

Bear with me guys, this might get a little rambly and off path a little, but I’ve been thinking a lot lately about weight. Not necessarily weight…more like (mainly) women’s unhealthy obsession with weight. But I don’t even really think weight is the issue…it’s more what we look like, how big or small we are…why is there such an emphasis on our size? Why is this a thing? Like at what point did women start deciding that their value comes from how they look on the outside instead of the content of their character?

“If you’re always trying to be normal you will never know how amazing you can be.” – Maya Angelou

I don’t think I fit the societal norms here, to be honest. I am big, plus size, overweight, obese, morbidly obese, fat, whatever term you use for describing my size…however, I have NEVER seen myself as big as I actually am. I am confident in my body. Is it harder to do some things physically because of my size, I’m sure it is, but I wouldn’t know because I’ve never been the super tiny girl. I’ve always ‘had some meat on my bones’. Was it harder when I was dating, to be bigger than other girls my age? Nope, I never had trouble getting asked out or getting male attention. Do I have low self-esteem or self confidence because of my size? No, not really. I don’t find my self-worth in my dress size…sorry, not sorry that I don’t see myself as less than because I don’t fit what society has deemed as attractive and worthy all because the scale is a higher number than you are comfortable seeing.

Is this to say that I don’t place value on taking care of myself or eating healthy and moving? Heck no! What I am saying is that I don’t think it’s healthy for one to be so consumed with eating healthy and exercising for the sole purpose of losing weight as opposed to eating healthy and exercising because it’s good for you, no matter your size or the number on the scale. I’m pretty healthy, I have no medical issues that are typically attributed to being overweight (high bp, diabetes, circulation issues, high cholesterol) but people don’t see our medical records when they look at us, do they? They just look at me and see how big I am and automatically assume I must consume all the unhealthiest of foods and do nothing but sit on my butt.

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As I’ve scrolled through each of my social media accounts lately, it has struck me that even the most ‘healthy’ and fit, the thinnest people I know still aren’t happy with their bodies. Why? Who is telling you that you aren’t good enough? Why are you letting them? This isn’t even about body positivity to me right now. I do want every body to feel good about themselves, but when I think about it, I want everyone to feel good about themselves because they are happy in their life and relationships and career. I am definitely not trying to knock people who are proud of themselves for being the healthiest, most fit, strongest they have ever been because they are taking the time to work and push to accomplish things physically to test themselves. I think that is amazing and awesome! I just worry about the women who are out there killing themselves to attain a smaller size or smaller number on the scale just because they think that will make them happy or make other people happy.

“Work out because you love your body, not because you hate it” – Katie Goulet

I have many friends who have expressed feelings of not being confident to even wear a swimsuit, let a lone a bikini, because they have a belly, or thick thighs, or are just bigger than what society has told them is the appropriate size to be right now. Each time, the thing that comes to mind is how to get a bikini body….have a body, put a bikini on it, now you have a bikini body. I recently took this to heart and purchased a bikini. Not a tankini like has been my go to for the last 10ish years…but an actual bikini. And I love it. I feel confident in it. It makes me happy to wear it. And I hope that when my daughter sees me in it, she sees that she too can wear whatever makes her feel confident and beautiful and doesn’t let other peoples opinions get into her head and ruin her self image.

For a really long time, I followed the crowd – must lose weight so I can be more acceptable to everyone around me, must hide my body because no one wants to see a plus size woman in anything that shows any skin, must perpetuate the cycle of self hate because that’s what society tells women is normal behavior…I thought I was so fat, I thought I was unattractive, I thought I was unhealthy, I thought my value was tied into the number on the scale. In all of these old pictures of me, I thought I was so huge compared to my friends…what the hell was I on?! Looking at them now, I see a beautiful woman who was healthy and was the same size as all of her friends! All those years I spent hating myself, my body, because why?…I don’t even know at this point.

Do I say all of this to say that I never have moments of weakness now when I see a picture of myself and think, wow am I really that big? No, I totally have those moments but they don’t define me. The number on the scale doesn’t define me. I don’t have a single desire to lose weight so that people will find me easier to look at, or more worthy of their attention. I have a desire to be healthy and to work on loving all of myself, flaws and imperfections included. I’m not willing to hide for anyone anymore. My wish for every woman I know, is that she would see herself and love herself, as is. Stop the self hate, start loving yourself so we can stop the cycle of teaching our children to hate themselves if they don’t fit whatever society has deemed acceptable. <3

July Goals

Wow. No bs. No excuses guys. Blog hiatus game is strong! It was 6 months long and although it was completely unintentional, it was necessary. I’ve mentioned before that I suffer from anxiety and depression…I have since my late teens. I’ve managed it successfully without medication since my early 20’s (yeah, that’s about 20 years) but occasionally, it sneaks up on me and before I even know it’s happening I’m in it. That’s where I’ve been. I haven’t had a depression this deep and dark in YEARS and to be quite honest, I couldn’t stop this one. Usually I see the signs…I see it coming before it happens and I know how to prevent it from completely taking me over. This one…this one was so different. I know the exact moment, we were driving in the car and it was like a switch was flipped. Literally one second I was totally good and the very next second, I was gone. It was weeks before I even cared enough to acknowledge it. Depression is an ugly beast. As I have slowly come out of it and gotten back to me, I have started to find myself being drawn back into the things I love and that’s why I’m back here once again.

I thought since it’s the beginning of another new month, I’d jump right in with a welcome to July and share some of my goals for the month

Choose Happy

This one is super important to me right now. I know that happiness is a choice more than anything else. You can choose to be bitter and angry or you can choose to find happiness in the little things and joy in the moments of chaos. As a stay at home mama, there’s a lot more moments of chaos than I’d care to admit, I don’t always have everything all under control…my kids do run the house sometimes. Even in those moments when I feel like it’s all going to hell in a hand basket, there’s a moment of hilarity that I can find my happy and try to salvage a little bit of my sanity. Teenager and Threenager ain’t no joke y’all.

Do More Yoga

I find so much peace and calm in just taking 10 minutes to get some yoga in each day. I feel centered and strong. I am by no means an expert in yoga and I’m not even super great at it, but you know what’s awesome about yoga? You don’t have to be to benefit from it. Just start where you’re at! Start with one simple pose and build on that. There are a lot of great YouTube videos on yoga as well as a few different apps for like yoga daily with new poses to try. I highly recommend looking into yoga if you haven’t yet.

Budget Wisely

This one is a toughy for me. I am not a saver or budgeter by nature. I’m totally a spender, a shopper, an impulse buyer with very little buyers remorse…ever. lol I’m trying to get better at this and so it’s one of my goals for this month. To be better at setting and sticking to a budget. I’m not looking to get all crazy about it and go super strict at this point. Like, you people who do those ‘no buys’…I am sorry to say but I think y’all are nuts! haha

Take More Pictures

This one is pretty self explanatory I think, but I’ll elaborate. As moms, we are usually the ones taking lots of random little pics of our kids…the funny faces or other shenanigans they get into. I want to be more intentional about the pictures. Capturing more moments of my kids snuggling each other, or playing with their dad, or at the pool with me. I don’t just want to take pics of the rest of my family, I want to be IN those pictures with them! I want them to have photographic evidence that mama was there in that moment with them!

Be A Better Friend

I am almost positive this goal was also on my last goal post in January. This is something I know I am constantly needing to work on. I get really wrapped up in what I’m going through and dealing with that I tend to live my life with blinders on…only seeing what’s in my immediate line of sight. I don’t want to be that friend that we all have…the one who only talks to us when they need something, or when they need to vent not caring about what’s happening in our lives as long as we are there for whatever is going on in their life. I want to be the kind of friend who is always there to ask how the kids made out at the doctor, or what insane thing your husband did to annoy you or make you laugh. I want to make my friends feel important and HEARD…valued and appreciated for all the ways my life is enriched by them being in it. So I am pretty sure this is just going to be an ongoing goal because I don’t ever see me being such an amazing friend that I can stop working on being a better friend to my people.

Hustle

I haven’t mentioned this yet but I recently became an independent consultant with Perfectly Posh, don’t worry I’m not gonna start posting tons of sales type stuff, but one of my goals is definitely to share Posh. When I say hustle, I don’t just mean with Posh either. I mean, all of my interests and businesses. It’s time to get back to doing the things I really love and that bring me happiness…blogging, YouTube, and all things beauty!

So, those are my goals for the month…what are yours? I’d love to hear some things you are going to be working on this month and maybe we can help encourage each other. xo

ELF Skincare Review

Disclaimer: All products mentioned in this blog post were purchased by me, with my money, this is NOT a sponsored post. All opinions and thoughts are 100% based on my own personal experience.

Hello beauties! I wanted to talk a little about skincare today. The older I get, the more I’m paying attention to the skincare products I’m using and focusing less on the makeup products. If you don’t have great skin, all the expensive makeup in the world is not going to hide that fact, so I’d rather focus a little more on skincare first, make sure the canvas is the best it can be before we paint it up with the art that is makeup, you know what I’m sayin?

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I had been seeing people all over the beauty community talk about the ELF Skincare line sold at Walmart or Target, wherever ELF products are sold, but I was reluctant to try it because I had a routine that was working well. I am not someone who gets a lot of breakouts, as long as I’m thoroughly cleansing and moisturizing my skin, generally the only time I get breakouts is when I’m pms’ing (ah the joys!). I generally stick to the ‘if it ain’t broke don’t fix it’ when it comes to skincare, but after hearing so many good things the ELF line, I decided to give it a try. The products are all pretty affordable, I think they are around $12 for each product in the line.

I picked up the daily cleanser, serum, and moisturizer. Personally, I use them in the morning and have a totally different set of products that I use for my nighttime skincare routine.

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Overall, I really have liked this line for a couple of reasons:

They are super gentle – I don’t feel like my face is being scrubbed raw, the scent is pleasant and not overwhelming.
They are not greasy or heavy – When you apply the serum and moisturizer, they are not sticky or tacky or heavy.
My skin feels really clean and hydrated after using these products.

I love finding products that work well with my skin, that are really affordable, and are easily accessible. As I’m getting older I find that the less scented and harsh the products are the better my skin does with it. I’d love to hear what skincare products you use and why you love them, leave me a comment with your favorite makeup remover, that’s something I’m still on the hunt for!

40th Birthday and Christmas Wish List

Hello my lovelies! Today I wanted to talk about some of the items that are on my birthday and Christmas wish list! I don’t share very often about products that I’ve got my eye on, but I thought this was the perfect time, what with my 40th birthday just a couple of weeks away and Christmas not long after. So, without further adieu, I give you…my birthday and christmas wish list!

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Now, contrary to what some people might try to tell you, I do NOT have enough makeup brushes…especially when there is a set this gorgeous on the market. It Cosmetics brushes tend to be one of the best out there. They are incredibly soft and luxerious, while being sturdy and a really solidly built brush. I love this set for a couple of reasons:

I am a sucker for the packaging and the actual look of these brushes
It Cosmetics makes awesome brushes so the quality is just as amazing as the design of the brushes
This set is all you’d need to do a full face

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It Cosmetics All That Glitters Brush Set

I have heard so many YouTube “Beauty Guru’s” talk about how amazing the Tarte Shape Tape Concealer is that it’s been on my wish list for a couple of months now. I mean according to the biggest beauty YouTubers around, this stuff is the bees knees. There isn’t anything that can beat it for coverage and staying power. I must try it for all of us who aren’t in our early 20’s and see if it it’s just as amazing for those of us with more mature skin types as it is for those younger more fresh faced women!

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Tarte Shape Tape Contour Concealer

This one is another cult favorite, MAC lipstick in the shade Myth. I know there are so many celebs and beauty gurus who have made this lipstick the must have that it is today. I want it because it’s a beautiful shade and I love MAC lipsticks, it’s just so pretty!

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MAC Myth

Ok, now this one…I am DYING for this one! This is the Kat Von D Matte Metals Palette. I absolutely adore the aestetic of this palette and the shade range, plus the pigmentation of these shadows…totally worth the high price tag. I’ve had Kat Von D shadows before and they are some the most pigmented shadows I’ve ever used, really rich and vibrant colors that blend out beautifully.

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Kat Von D – Metal Matte Palette

There’s really not much to say about this one, it’s a beautiful scent. I don’t go through bottles of perfume very fast, so I prefer to have just a rollerball that I will go through the whole thing and if I want to repurchase I can without worrying about wasting any of it.

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Michael Kors – Wanderlust

Ok, I’m gonna just say it…the biggest reason I want this lip gloss is because it looks AMAZING on Jaclyn Hill and I want it to look that good on me! haha But no really, she talks about this gloss all the time and I really do want it just because she raves about it!

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Marc Jacobs – Sugar Sugar Lip Gloss

Over the last few years, I have gotten more into using wax warmers instead of candles because of having a toddler in the house again…it’s just not safe to have candles burning and tempting him to climb on anything and everything to get to them. I do have a few candles around the house that are used very sparingly and the next three items on my wishlist are candles that I want to add to my stash of candles to keep around the house for special occasions!

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Winter – Bath and Body Works

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Holiday Sparkle – Bath and Body Works

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A Thousand Wishes – Bath and Body Works

This next item is the Real Techniques Diamond Sponge. I’ve seen reviews floating around YouTube about this makeup sponge and I really want to test it out for myself and see if I like it as much as all these other YouTube Beauty Guru’s! I do already use and love the Real Techniques makeup sponge *the original one* but this one just intrigues me so I really just want it for that reason!

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Real Techniques – Diamond Sponge

Ok, you guys. Can we all just take a minute and appreciate the beauty of these taupe booties?! I mean, I just fell in deep deep love with these babies the minute I saw them when I was browsing Target’s website. They are so pretty and with a low enough heel that I won’t kill myself walking in them or chasing a toddler around either. Love these so much!

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Target – Taupe Booties

Last, but certainly not least on my wish list, this gorgeous bralette and panty set. I love how it’s feminine and flirty, it’s sexy without being trashy…I mean I’m sure there’s a time and a place for trashy but this just is pretty and I feel like I’d feel pretty wearing it, for ME, not for anyone else…ya know what I mean? Of course you do πŸ˜‰
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Lovesick – Racerback Bralette and Panty

I really hope y’all enjoyed seeing my birthday and Christmas wish list, I’d love to know what some of the items on your wishlists are…who knows maybe I’ll need to add some more items to mine!

1 Palette 5 Looks – Morphe x KathleenLights Palette

Hello my beauties! Today I’m sharing five eye looks using just one shadow palette! Now, I realize this palette sold out super fast on the Morphe website, but I do know they are bringing it back one more time before Christmas. It’s a really super affordable palette, plus you can find a discount code on Kathleen’s YouTube channel that gets you an extra 10% off. The only thing I wasn’t super enthused about was the nearly $8 for shipping…OUCH. But I still only paid just under $23 bucks total for the palette and shipping, so that’s not awful.

Yes! Got my hands on the new @kathleenlights @morphebrushes palette! #makeup #beauty #makeuplover

A photo posted by Chrissy Thomas (@dashofdiva) on


Anyway, let’s get into it, shall we? I know it’s really easy to get into a rut using that same palette you just love over and over, you find a look you like and it becomes easiest to just use the same products and do the same look everyday to save time, but I thought about it and if I have all these colors in this palette, why not try and just create a few different eye looks all using just this one palette. It has everything you need from a matte white to a matte black to shimmers and transition shades, something for everyone!

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I have heard mixed reviews on this palette, and I’ve gotta be honest, I really like this palette. I have found it to have great pigmentation in all of the individual pans, I find them easy to blend out, I don’t find them overly powdery or soft – with exception of that gorgeous green (the second from the left on the bottom row), that shade is a lot softer than the others, but in no way chunky or crumbly. I do really like this palette and have found myself reaching for it almost every day since I got it. I love that it’s affordable but I don’t love that it’s limited edition so if you want it you gotta make sure to keep an eye on social media – KathleenLights instagram and Morphe’s instagram will most likely have all the info about the new release date if you want to pick this palette up!

What is your go – to palette lately?

The Power of Makeup

Hello beauties!

What, can it really be? ANOTHER actual blog post?! Yes, yes it is!

I recently filmed a video for my YouTube channel that was inspired by the talented NikkieTutorials. She had filmed a video called The Power of MakeupThe Power of Makeup a while back and I had intended to do my version for a while and just never got around to it, until just recently.

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So, here’s the deal, basically you just do you. Why do YOU wear makeup? How does makeup make you feel about yourself? If you are happy wearing a full face of makeup or not wearing a single stitch of makeup, that is what matters – YOUR happiness. Not how anyone else sees you. Not if people think you wear too much makeup or not enough makeup or your makeup is too bright or too dark. Makeup is an individual thing, some people feel their best with just a little bit of lip balm on and some of us feel our best wearing full on glam (yes, even during the day and we have nothing to do but the laundry or scrub toilets). I will never understand why people think they get to have an opinion on someone else’s personal preference for THEIR OWN FACE! Gah!

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I decided to use both high end and drugstore items when I did my Power of Makeup look and as you can see, the difference in my face with no makeup on and then full on dark smokey eye and lashes…the important thing to note, I am comfortable with my face in either state. I have no issues leaving the house with no makeup on. On the other side of it, I also have no issues leaving the house in full on glam, even if I’m just running to the grocery store or to get gas. I’m comfortable with MYSELF, no matter what anyone’s opinion of me is…

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There, now that I got that out in the open πŸ˜‰

Here is the video I filmed on The Power of Makeup, I really do hope you take a few minutes to watch it and really listen to the message, love you for you, all of you, flaws and all. Be happy just being you, makeup or no makeup. Also, don’t try to bring down anyone else for any reason, but for the purpose of this post, especially not because they choose to wear more (or less) makeup than you do. You do you!

Big love my friends, from me to you!

Make Up For Ever Ultra HD Wear Test

Hello beauties! I know, I know…I’ve been posting really sporadically again. Life, man. It gets busy and when somethings gotta give, the blog is usually it. I found myself with some free time (ha!) so I thought I’d share a little something something here πŸ˜‰

I was recently sent an Influenster voxbox and it was an amazing box, let me tell you! I was lucky enough to be one of the influencers selected to get the Make Up For Ever box, they sent over the Ultra HD liquid and stick foundations for me to test out and wow! I love them both but this stick foundation is awesome.

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The first foundation I tested out was the Make Up For Ever Ultra HD stick foundation, which applies really easily and blends out evenly and makes my skin look absolutely flawless.

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The next day, I tested out the Make Up For Ever Ultra HD liquid foundation. Again, this foundation applies really well and has really excellent coverage. It can be built up, but I find it really doesn’t need to be built up unless you have a lot of redness or uneven color on your face. The finish is really beautiful and looks flawless.

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The third day, I decided to do a wear test because both of the previous days, I’d had my makeup on for over 15 hours and the foundation lasted really well through the entire 15+ hours of wear time. I wanted to see exactly how they’d hold up against each other so I applied the stick to one side of my face and the liquid to the other side.

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The stick foundation is the picture on the left and the liquid is on the right in both of these images.

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make up for ever wear test morning vs night

As you can see, they both hold up really nicely. I did have some shiny spots and places where my oils had broken through or worn away the foundation, but if I had touched up at all through the day, I doubt they would have worn down this way. I can say with certainty that these two foundations are my absolute top 2 out of the drawer full of both drugstore and high end foundations that I have right now. Thank you Influenster and Make Up For Ever for letting me test these foundations out!

As a bonus, here’s the wear test I did for my YouTube channel:

By the way, if you’d like an invite to join Influenster, leave me a comment below and I’ll send you the invite!